Holding On

Aug. 8th, 2009 06:20 pm
twentyeytako: (Default)
[personal profile] twentyeytako
Title: Holding on
Author: twentyeytako
Pairing(s):RyoDa
Rating:Safe
Genre:Angst
Beta by: me. *yep.*
Disclaimer: I still think I’m one of Johnny's lost nieces or granddaughters and i will inherit the company when he retires. until that happens, I don’t own any of them.
Summary: Ueda want to let go but someone reminded him why he's holding on in the first place
Author Note: again, it's short. Exam week is here and i wrote this to get in the mood. i felt i need to write something for me to have the inspiration to study. COMMENT PEOPLE!i wanna read them after my exams week. it'll surely make up for all my hard work. :}



Countless nights of fights, faces bruised and egos crushed. It comes to the point where he wants to give up. He doesn't want to hurt Ryo anymore and he knows the other doesn’t want to hurt him too.

Their fights would always start with petty things but because of their hot tempered personalities, they would blow up on each other. Ryo's poison tongue and 
Tatsuya's boxing skills doesn't help in solving their problem. Once Ryo starts to say harsh words, it's is in Ueda' s instincts to hit him. Although not as skilled as Ueda, Ryo would fight back. They would end up bruised and panting. Ryo would walk out of the apartment to look for someone to talk to and treat his wounds while Tatsuya would be left behind.

A few moments after Ryo leaves, Tatsuya's tears would start pouring from his eyes. His body aches and his wounds stings but the pain he's feeling physically is nothing compared to the pain he's feeling in his heart. It is always after the fight that he wishes he never hit Ryo. It is at this moment that he wants to hug Ryo and tell him how sorry he is and treat all his wounds.

As he looks around their trashed apartment, he remembers all the happy times they spend there. He remembers all their sweet memories which caused his to cry more. As he thinks about it and thinks about the fights they have, he can't help but feel sad. Though he and Ryo share sweet and happy memories, he doesn't know if he can still take the fights they will have. It is clear to him that Ryo is the only person he will love and would make him feel happy but he doesn't want to be hurt and to hurt Ryo again. He thinks it'll be better if they go their separate ways. He'll be satisfied to continue loving him from afar.

Tatsuya's cell phone rang.

"Hello?" Tatsuya answered trying his best not to sound like he was crying.

"Tat-chan? It's Kame." the caller said.

"Ah. Kame, What is it?" He asked

"Uhmmm.. Tat-chan, are you okay?" Kame asked sounding worried

"Uh... Y-yes. I'm okay, Kame."

"Jin and I saw Ryo walking down the streets and..."

Kame paused when he heard a sob from the other line.

"...his face looked bruised and...And he was crying."

Tatsuya didn't say a word but Kame can still hear his sobs.

"You fought again didn't you?" Kame asked

"No." Tatsuya disagreed trying to hold his tears.

"Don't lie Tat-chan. The only time Ryo gets bruised like that is when you two fight and the only reason he cries is because of you." Kame said.

Kame was right and Tatsuya knows it. Among his friends, only Kame understands his relationship with Ryo.I t is always Kame who's always there to comfort him and Kame who was always there to help him understand.

"I give up. I don't want to continue this anymore." Tatsuya said.

"Why?" Kame asked.

"Because I can't bear hurting him and I know he doesn't want to continue hurting me too."

Kame didn't say anything so Tatsuya continued.

"I think it would be better if we go our separate ways. I think it's for the best. I can live loving him from afar." Tatsuya said.

Kame sighed from the other line before saying something.

"Tat-chan, do you remember why you held on for so long?" Kame asked

Tatsuya was surprised at Kame's question.

"It is because you love him so much that you don't want to be apart from him. You said before that though the two of you hurt each other, the hugs and the kisses you share afterwards are sweeter and more memorable..."

Kame was waiting for Tatsuya to say something but the other kept quiet.

"Do you remember ther eason? It's because those hugs and kisses are a result of understanding and not giving up on each other. Your mind tells you that all this should end because of the physical pain you're feeling but listen to your heart. I know it completely disagrees. Physical pain would heal but it is hard to mend a broken heart. Your heart begs to be with Ryo and I know his heart longs to be with you too. Your heart beats for one another that when the other is gone, the other would not survive." Kame said.

As soon as Kame’s words sank into him, Tatsuya dropped his phone and ran outside. For the first time after they fought, he ran outside to look for Ryo. This 
time, he would make sure he says sorry to his lover and assure him that he still believes they belong to each other and that he will hold on to him forever.

Date: 2009-08-08 11:10 am (UTC)

Date: 2009-08-08 11:25 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ayaryo.livejournal.com
Awwww~
Ganbare Tat-chan!!
Go find your lover and make up and make out!!!! *pervert grin*

Wait, I thought I was on hiatus from RyoDa?? O______o;
WHY IS THAT YOUR FIC ALWAYS MAKE ME WANT TO READ THEM??
I shall blame you for that.

Your sweet fics, are giving me cavity D:
God,I want to live.

Mica-chan, good job! *thumbs up*
*goes back to hiatus*

Date: 2009-08-08 11:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] twentyeytako.livejournal.com
aya-chaaaaan! *throws a really big hug*

well, even if you're on hiatus, ryoda will always make it's way to you. LOL. it's okay if you blame me. :P wait till i finish my multi-chap. i shall post the ending next week.*insert evil laugh here*

i'm really glad you read them. thanks for reading!

Date: 2009-08-08 11:44 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ayaryo.livejournal.com
mica-chaaaaaaan!! *huggles*

haha,that's quite true ya know XDD
then i won't stop blaming you ♥
damn,just wait for my killing death glare next week
I shall wait for it.
Please save the first spot for me,and don't blame me for spamming your inbox ne♥

:D♥

Date: 2009-08-08 11:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] twentyeytako.livejournal.com
aya-chan for the first spot: NOTED! :D

it's time to finish that fic and think of a new one. LOL. i'm pretty sure it'll take some time before i write a multichap again and i think it'll make me feel good if i write it right after my exams. YOSH! i'll do my bes. :}

Date: 2009-08-08 12:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ayaryo.livejournal.com
Ahhh~yay!
Thank you so much!! :D♥

Wow,good luck!
And I shall.....try to finish my fic too
Do it after your exam ne~ :D
Gambatte!!

Date: 2009-08-08 12:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] twentyeytako.livejournal.com
thank you!

good luck to you too! :}

Date: 2009-08-08 11:55 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maikenap.livejournal.com
sweet....
but i'm not into domestic violence...
slapping is the farthest i could go...
but when you think a bout it...
it can be avoided... they just have to learn...

i love it...

sweetsssssssssss.............

Date: 2009-08-08 11:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] twentyeytako.livejournal.com
if it's ryo and ueda we're talking about, there's about 50% violence *be it physical or verbal*

long time since i've read your comment on my work! welcome back! *throws hugs*

Date: 2009-08-08 12:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maikenap.livejournal.com
yeah... sorry about that... i was kinda going hysterical for quite a while...
my videos of kat-tun...specifically, solos of jin got deleted some how...
and i can't find some of them in the net anymore...
and now i really don't know where to look... hay~~~~

oh yeah... i have to run to magic and sparks...
i haven't commented on them... *bows down*
so i have to visit your lj...hehehe... gomen....

sweetsssssssssss........

Date: 2009-08-08 01:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] twentyeytako.livejournal.com
awwww. i'm so sorry to hear that.
have you tried jor? i got most of my videos there. :D

i'll be happy to read your comments! thanks! :D

Date: 2009-08-08 12:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] akoisme.livejournal.com
GOAAAALLLL!!! :)) yeaa boy! i read it! waa~! you know how impatient i am.. and a curious cat :) haahaha :))

wooo~!!! the ending is hanging!!! :O napuntahan nya?! nihalikan nya ba??! hahaha :) wee~! im liking RyoDa but.. still, AKame pa din akooo! :)) waaa~!!!

okaay.. comment ko. :)) lurve it. so sensitive of Kame :) awww... Ryo shed tears *throws a hanky to Ueda for her him to wipe Ryo's tears*--> oh the hell.. no need na pala... hug lang at non-stop kisses lang ang kapalit nian! :))

the best ka tlga, Mama Mentor.. sino... ang inspiration dito? :) ayyikee :)) *bawal si Inoo Kei ang rason :))*

Date: 2009-08-08 01:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] twentyeytako.livejournal.com
ewan. siguro napuntahan niya. super shower ng kisses? maybe? hahahaha!

ako din. akame pa din ang number one. wait for an akame fic after i finish my ryoda multichap. i have something on my mind. :D

inspiration? wla nga e..bigyan mo nga ako! hahahaha!

Date: 2009-08-10 09:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] akoisme.livejournal.com
hahaha =)) yeaaa! to console Ryo :) waa~! :))

syempwe!!! :)) sige sige!!! tell mee! :)) multi chappp?! :) anooo story nun?:))

hahaha :) ako madami sa uste e.. pakalat kalat sila =))

hayy, prelims na bukas! :) ganbatte, mama Mentor :))

Date: 2009-08-08 12:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] raixas.livejournal.com
*sobs*
i cried too much for the past 24 hours, reading fics...
someone, stop me~ waaaa

mica-chan, thank you very much for the fic~ i love it~
thats just sooo ryoda~

Date: 2009-08-08 01:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] twentyeytako.livejournal.com
rai-chan!

*throw lots and lots of tissue*

stop crying ne? i have good news for you. i'll post bringing you back's ending next week. wait for it okay?

*hugs and chu~s fo reading*

Date: 2009-08-08 03:24 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kazuya-love.livejournal.com
lols.. mica i don't know what to comment! haha! i'm the first one who had read this before but i was the one who failed to comment ... the only thing that i remembered was i was crying already while reading this one then one of our prof came... lols... nandun na ako sa latter part bgla pa xa dumating! haha! anyway! Ganbatte on our exams.. *sighs* still having problems with my calculator.. T_T
master ko n din ung square sa wakas! hahah!

Date: 2009-08-08 10:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] candyapplegirls.livejournal.com
Ate Mica~ *glomps* Jasmine told me that you missed me? :P I MISS YOU, TOO! WEEE~ I saw you on the entourage list of Misaki's party. ;] How was it? XD I still miss you and wait for my ryoda, ne?


-- Eien♥

Date: 2009-08-09 02:37 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] twentyeytako.livejournal.com
hey!! super misses! gaghd! i miss your comments on my fics. *you have a lot to catch up to!*

yep. i was on the entourage. it was great. *parang nandun tlga e no?*

Date: 2009-08-08 10:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] candyapplegirls.livejournal.com
&& Yes. I'm still drooling over Inoo-chaaan~ *oggles at your header then slightly drools* *gets whacked on the head by a jealous Keito and Hikaru* MOU~ JEALOUS BASTARDS! xP I still love them though. ^_^♥ *glomps Hikaru and Keito* I WUUUFF YOU TWO!

&& WHAT UP WITH TEH ANGST?! I can't read right now since I'm doing a project and exams week's coming up. =_=

Date: 2009-08-09 02:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] twentyeytako.livejournal.com
drool all you want. it's okay. *bawal lng agawin. :P*

ah... it just happend to be angst. i dunno why. :)
exams week ko na rin. good luck to us!

Date: 2009-08-09 01:03 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jindaluver.livejournal.com
owh~
kame words make me wanna cry...
*hold on my tears*

tat-chan,go n search for ryo!! *cheering*
thank you for sharing~
it's lovely ^^

Date: 2009-08-09 01:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fyad7.livejournal.com
i hope they make up and their fights become a little less violent. anyways, i'm glad kame was there to help tat-chan see that he could never leave ryo. thanks for sharing!!

Date: 2009-08-10 02:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] alaruber.livejournal.com
*TAKES OUT A PEN AND PAPER*
yup i m sure this too sweet and i need to fine you with more sweet loving ryoda MUHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH :)

hello dearie :)
gosh that is really too sweet :D hehe u made me bright and cheerful now :) long weekends are really getting to me after some shit stuff :(
I m mad late. :( but good luck on ur exams babe :)))) GAMBARE :)

Date: 2009-08-14 03:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] twentyeytako.livejournal.com
nyahahaha! i owe you a lot now and my debt will increase because i'm postying bringing you back's final chappie tobight or tomorro morning *depends on when i actually finish writing. :P*

thanks for the good luck. you too, good luck on ur school. exams are finally over! KYAAAA~ :D

Date: 2009-09-20 03:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] einji.livejournal.com
"the only reason he cries is because of you" that was deep T.T they should act more like grown-ups though *scolding ryoda* but yeah, true love lasts ... maybe ueda should stop going to the gym though... ^^"

Date: 2009-09-20 03:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] twentyeytako.livejournal.com
LOL. i'll write you a fic if you read all my ryoda's KIDDING! :))

Date: 2009-09-20 03:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] twentyeytako.livejournal.com
LOL. i might do it if you do read everything including the two multichaps. i have loads of ideas for a fic right now but i dunno which one to write first. :))

long comment

Date: 2009-09-20 03:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] einji.livejournal.com
tempting ~but with the beginning of skul year,it's also pretty much impossible x.x
also, i don;t read multichapters often O: because i got to write too and so i dont have time for everything, trying to keep in touch with my 3 fave pairings and side ones, its hard xD ah, which reminds me i have to continue my own multichapter T.T i already have a ryoda fic written since july xD but now it's not the time to post it (it's not amazing or anything but i got my reasons for keeping it)n i also engaged in a theme fic contest with another buddy and started a fic with my BFF (doubt well finish it, its too random o-o) n more importantly, still ahvent done my homework XD

Re: long comment

Date: 2009-09-20 04:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] twentyeytako.livejournal.com
school works consume most of our fangirling life. *sigh* i can't wait for my univ break. btw, where are you from? and isn't that dong hae on your icon feel free to smack me if i'm wrong

Re: long comment

Date: 2009-09-20 04:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] einji.livejournal.com
it does, doesn;t it O: ?!! well, my next break is in *counts on fingers* 3 months :I... im from eastern europe and yes, thats him, eunahe is my OTP ^^"

Re: long comment

Date: 2009-09-20 04:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] twentyeytako.livejournal.com
oooh! eastern europe! weeee. i'm from the philippines btw. how old are you? i'm 18. LOL.

my 3 weeks break will be a month away from now. i'm so excited. :D

Re: long comment

Date: 2009-09-20 04:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] einji.livejournal.com
so you r pinoy :3 yet you r the niece of johnny ~ hurray for mixed races LOL,

im 16 n a half :)
good luck with skul and with the waiting for the holiday to come, i started my countdown too, beginning with the 1st class i had :)))

Re: long comment

Date: 2009-09-21 12:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] twentyeytako.livejournal.com
yep. i'm pinoy (pinay specifically). yep. i really think i'm his long lost niece or something. someday i'll run JE together with my hubby and kids. LOL im starting to sound creepy now. sorry

wow. ur 16. i miss being 16. i wanna be 16 forever. :))

Date: 2009-09-25 03:32 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kazuha-ono.livejournal.com
this is not fluff its angst...

Date: 2011-01-28 02:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] yamada1317.livejournal.com
awwww Ganbare Tatsuya ^^ go find Ryo and tell him your sorry and that you love hi so much

Date: 2011-03-05 09:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fancyann1974.livejournal.com
oh thank goodness kame talked some sense into ueda
ueda run and find ryo and tell him how you feel and dont let go
thank you so much for sharing

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